Category: Education

Growing and Increasing in Wisdom One Thing at a Time

I am so glad to be back. I have missed you all. I loved the break, but I missed sharing my thoughts and ideas. : ) Here is something that happened to me during my vacation from writing.

My Vacation Experience

In 2022 I read a book titled Sabbath: Finding Rest, Renewal, and Delight in Our Busy Lives by Wayne Muller. I posted a review of it on Facebook on June 6, 2022. Before sharing my experience, I want to tell you about the book. It wasn’t written by a person from my spiritual persuasion. He presented the Sabbath and all its parts from the perspective of many religions, some not even Christian. It was fascinating how many spiritual cultures recognize the need for space, thought, and rest. So don’t be afraid to read the book even if you are not religious or don’t profess any relationship to God. Read it with the perspective that you are going to learn something new about rest, slowing down, and making space. It wasn’t written to convert but to enlighten.

I didn’t need to read another book about the Sabbath. My spiritual culture teaches a lot about the Sabbath, and I have grown up knowing or thinking I knew about rest. However, this book taught the principles of the Sabbath in a way that was insightful and somewhat new to me. His take on rest was far different than I had ever thought of. I loved it when he said that if you sweep the floor, it will need to be swept again the next day, so not sweeping it for a day is OK. I know that, but do you have things you feel compelled to do? I do.

Here is what I loved about this book – it wasn’t just about a day of worship. It was about how to manage a busy life. It was about renewal, gratitude, and rest. It was different and very helpful in changing my perspective.

Now for the honest part. After reading the book, I created a worksheet on how I could use all the beautiful concepts I learned. I picked one thing which I implemented and still do every day. Each night when I take my self-care shower, which I have been doing since I was sixteen, I light a candle. I pray for someone. Then I talk to God about my day. I have been doing this for almost a year, and it has been SO HELPFUL. It ends my day on a high note, no matter how the day has gone. But the list, with all the other great ideas, was stashed on my desk and forgotten.

Recently, while cleaning my desk, I ran across my notes from the book, the list. I was astounded because the ideas were so good! I couldn’t believe that I had only intentionally implemented one thing. But then I, like you, get busy, and things fall by the wayside even when I don’t want them to.

Here is my plan and I don’t know why I didn’t do it before. On the walls of my room, I have a plethora of fabulous quotes and instructions to myself that I look at often. By my bed are things I want to accomplish and some longer pieces of knowledge that I never want to forget. Some mornings and evenings I sit on the side of my bed and review this wonderful, faith-building, soul-lifting information. This page of notes should have had a home there, and now it does.

My list contains such helpful information that I decided to share my list with you just as I wrote it out after reading the book. Maybe it will encourage you to read Sabbath for yourself. Possibly you will implement some of these great ideas. Either way, I hope what moved me will be of value to you.

The List

REST

• Light a candle and pray- let the hurry of the world fall away.
• Pick one technology to not use on Sunday. Use the computer or phone only for Sunday
study.
• At your Sunday meal, take time to pray, plan, eat slowly, and enjoy.
• Take three mindful breaths whenever you move from one activity to another.
• Each day pray for the people around you.
• Choose a time to be still- don’t speak.

RHYTHM

•Take a slow 30-minute walk, an amble. Linger at flowers, rocks, etc., and enjoy the
air and beauty. This is not about exercising.
•Meditate with your breathing, find the rhythm of your breath.
•Spend some time in silence, outdoors, when possible. Slow down.
•Pray in your heart multiple times a day – it is a portable Sabbath.

TIME

•Set aside time to play with Don.
•Say my affirmations, what I value, and the precepts that guide my life.
•Stand at the altar in our temple and pray with others.
•Seek out those you love when you lose your way.
•Be a Sabbath for another who is struggling.

HAPPINESS

•Focus on gratefulness.
•On the Sabbath morning, lie in bed and look at my vision wall.
•Do something simple and playful daily – walk, put flowers on the table, color, do a
puzzle, sing.
•Walk barefoot, slowly, on this holy ground. (Meaning our home)

WISDOM

•Trust God to help you in crisis.
•Watch for the help you receive. See it.
•Find time to sit, walk, meditate, pray, read, etc. in nature, the temple, at home, or
church.
•Let go of something. Choose one thing each week. Lessen your stuff.
•Shower with a candle, music, and perfume. (Remember, as a caretaker I only have 15 min. for
a shower. : ) You busy moms can do this.)

CONSECRATION

•Before Sunday, choose a quiet place. Pray. Say what you need to say out loud.
•On Sunday, don’t seek, let what is be enough, and then pray in gratitude.
•Give something you love away to someone else who will love it.

ON SUNDAY

•Journal first thing in the morning, then pray and dress.
•Write letters of love.
•Connect with people.

TO END THE DAY

•At dinner, share the best part of the day and what you look forward to on the coming day or in the coming week. Burn a scented candle at dinner.

The sections came from the book. What to do came from me.

I pondered how I could make what the author taught in each section, work for me. For example, he suggested an altar, light a candle, and pray. In my spiritual culture, we do not use alters in our church buildings or our homes. But as I thought, I came up with the idea of lighting a candle during my nightly shower and praying for others and myself. It has worked wonderfully, no matter how out of the ordinary it may seem.

As I reread my list, I was surprised at how many things I have put in place unintentionally. I only implemented one thing with intention, the addition of a candle and prayer to my shower time, but so many others have become part of my days.
•Each day, I pray for the people around me.
•I say my affirmations daily.
•I pray with others in our temple.
•I am frequently a Sabbath for others who are struggling.
•I write in my gratitude journal daily.
•I walk barefoot in my home daily. Now I need to slow the pace. : )
•I trust God implicitly.
•I am watchful and grateful for the help that I see come.
•I shower with a perfumed candle. I sing after I pray while still in the shower.
•I write letters of love on Sunday.
•I have been connecting with people more than ever before. I set up calls ahead of time with
friends every few months and communicate via video, so connection really happens. I have to
plan ahead and schedule this connection because it isn’t part of my natural energy. : )

I Have A Plan

This list is impressive to me, but as you can see there is more that needs to become part of what I do, part of me so that it happens as naturally as the list above. That can’t happen in a day or a week. So, I have a plan.

I am going to pick one thing that I am not doing yet and do it daily or on Sunday, as the case may be, for one month. By then, it should be part of my system, and I won’t need to think about it. It will just happen because it is part of what I do, like my nightly shower. : ) Then I will pick another thing. At this pace, it will take me a few years to make everything part of my life, but I am OK with that. I have learned that the time it takes to grow and increase in wisdom isn’t important. Growing and increasing in wisdom is.

I hope that all of you will pick one thing. Maybe it will be to read the book and make your own list. It may be to adopt my list or part of it and begin implementing what matters to you. Just begin.

Tips for Stay-at-Home Parents Thinking of Going Back to School

When I had my first baby I was in college. I had one year left to graduate. However, I didn’t finish, as I needed to put my husband through school. I got a job a couple of blocks from home. When Don graduated, I became a stay-at-home mom for the next fifteen years.

During those years I made wedding cakes in my home. I was very good at it, but I never made much money. It was a good thing that I loved it and always covered my expenses. I did other things like cake decorating to bring in money for Christmas and simple vacations. But in reality, despite my entrepreneurial attempts, I was a stay-at-home mom.

When I was forty, I had my seventh child and I decided to finish my degree. I didn’t do any research because my daughter was going to a private school. I applied there and was able to do my degree at a distance. This was before online schools were a thing. The provost was willing to work with me because he had met me and knew my daughter.

Because of the many years, I had been out of school, I had to begin again. Too many of my special ed. credits were too old to count because the field had changed so much. I got my degree in Education where more of my earned credits counted.

When I finished my degree, I decided to work for my Master’s and I did it. It wasn’t easy. I had a small child and five of the other six were still at home. I had very few resources to help me out.

I have often thought that I could have used more information. But this was before the widespread use of computers. I was on my own. And as far as my entrepreneurial attempts, well I really could have used some help. : )

In this short article, Laura Pearson gives some great resource links for moms who want to go back to school and moms who want to be entrepreneurs. Hopefully, if you are thinking about doing either one you will find some help here.

Tips for Stay-at-Home Parents Thinking of Going Back to School

Transitioning from a stay-at-home parent to a student can be challenging. Balancing school,
family life, and the demands of an entirely new lifestyle can feel overwhelming. However,
with a little bit of research, planning, and support, going back to school is possible and can open up new opportunities for your future. Here are tips for stay-at-home parents thinking of going back to school, courtesy of Mary Ann Johnson. 

Selecting a Major
One of the most important decisions you will make when transitioning back into the world of
education is choosing a major. It’s best to do some research on what options are available
before committing to one area of study. Consider what interests you, what skills you have
and want to develop, and which areas offer potential jobs or business opportunities after
graduation. Taking an aptitude test or speaking with a career advisor can help you narrow
down your choices.

Scholarship Hunting
Going back to school as an adult can be expensive, so finding scholarships to cover tuition is a great idea. Need-based grants and scholarships offered by private foundations and organizations dedicated to helping adults return to college are often available. Researching scholarship options from various sources is a great way to minimize the financial burden of returning to school.

Attending Classes Online
If you’re not able to attend classes in person due to family commitments, there are plenty of
online courses available at many universities and colleges which allow you flexibility in
studying so that it works for your schedule. Most online courses include lectures, videos, and
written materials that you can access remotely on your computer, allowing you more control
over your learning experience.

Courses to Get You Ready for Business
One advantage of returning to school as an adult is that you have life experience under your belt that could prove invaluable to starting a business. Look into courses that support starting a business.  This would give you useful, real-world knowledge that would help you launch your own venture.

Setting Up a New Business
If you’re looking into starting up a business while studying, then there’s no doubt about it — it’s going to be tough. But with discipline and good time management skills, both tasks can be achieved together if done right.

Once you’ve started your business, the next step is to advertise! You should spread the
word via social media, of course, but if you’re looking to make your own business cards, this is a great way to supplement your digital advertising and provide a more tactile reminder to potential customers. And best of all, you can take advantage of various templates and customize them for free.

Going back to school after being away from the educational system for many years can be daunting, but it doesn’t have to be impossible. Careful planning and research, plus finding scholarships and good time management, can make a big difference to stay-at-home parents looking to further their education prospects and career success in the future.

Mary Ann Johnson is here to help parents find peace in a hectic world. If you have any questions, she’d love to hear from you!

Image via Pexels

Better Word Choice – Better Outcome

Understanding truth changes lives

Many years ago, I read Remember the Ice and Other Paradigm Shifts by Bob Nicoll. It was life-changing, or I could say it was communication-changing. : ) All these years later, when I engage in a conversation, I can hear Bob say, “Remember the ice!”

I attended an event that Bob spoke at and then I bought the book. I learned later that he was a friend of one of my clients. What a lovely coincidence or it would be if I believed in coincidences. We had a number of opportunities to visit together. Later, I was also privileged to be on stage with Bob, teaching parents together.

Bob had a passion for linguistics and empowering language choices. He focused his energies on studying the power of word choice: the Psychophysiology of Words, as he said. Now, that is a big word. : )

Bob had been a counseling psychologist, a business owner/consultant, a motivational speaker, a sales trainer, a restaurant owner, a financial planner, and a top sales manager. He knew the importance of all kinds of relationships and the power that words had in those relationships. He had a passion for helping people shift their paradigms with respect to empowering word choices. And that is how the book Remember the Ice came to be. So, what was in his book that was life-changing for me?

Let me share one story from the book and you will see.

In Bob’s words – Imagine being able to create a simple message. You know in your mind what you would like to convey. You get ready to share it with one of your precious children. You open your mouth, speak your mind, and then realize you have attracted the opposite of what you want.
Huh??? What’s that you say?

All you said to your precious 6-year-old was, “Don’t touch that vase.” Seconds later, you hear the sound of broken glass and your favorite, imported, crystal vase is on the floor in a myriad of pieces.

So why would he touch it after you specifically said, “DON’T touch that vase?” Before I share the answer, let me share a quick story.

It all began on July 23, 1991 — at 10:07 AM PDT

In a convenience store on Northern Avenue in Phoenix, AZ, the manager had placed a couple of signs above his cash registers. His intention was to encourage his patrons to buy more ice during the hot desert summer.

I lived across the street from this store and came to know him. Rick was working one day as I made a purchase. This time I paused and asked him how his ice sales were going because I am intrigued by word choice and the resulting behavioral outcomes. You see, the signs above the cash registers read: DON’T FORGET THE ICE

I asked Rick how sales were going. His reply was less than favorable. I paused and asked if I could make a suggestion. I mean, after all, this was Phoenix—in the desert—in the middle of the summer. (110+ degrees in the shade)

“Rick, do you have a couple of pieces of paper and a magic marker?” I inquired. He gave me the items and I quickly made two new signs for him. REMEMBER THE ICE

I left with a knowing smile and purposely stayed away for about a month. When I went back to the store, I spoke with Rick about his recent ice sales. “What did you do? My sales are up over 500% in the last 30 days!!”

I smiled and asked him a simple question: “If I say to you: Don’t think of the color blue. What color are you thinking of?” “Why blue of course” he replied. “Of course.” Now if I say, “don’t forget the ice”, what will you forget? “Hmmm… the ice.” “Right.”

Wasn’t that story awesome and haven’t you experienced something like this? I have with my own children, my husband, and friends. Words matter. What we say and how we say it impacts not only us but those we are talking to. Don’t is a word I rarely use because I hear Bob in my head.

Do you see how the innocent and commonly used message of “DON’T results in the opposite of what we want? Our mind has no conception of the word NOT (Bob explains more about that in his book), and we proceed to DO what follows the word Not (Do not or Don’t). So, the end result is, 6-year-old Tommy is compelled to touch the vase BECAUSE you told him to.

Words mean things. Word choice has behavioral consequences.

If mom had said, “leave the vase alone”, or “no touching the vase,” the end result is, you would have a beautiful piece of crystal to showcase your flowers. And this is the crux of the book.

How can you think differently about the words you use? How can you have better outcomes? How can words assist you in getting your kids, spouse, and others to respond positively more often?

I recommend Remember the Ice and Other Paradigm Shifts.

It is available on Amazon. You will be a better parent for having read it. Bob taught people that, “There is Power in the Clarity of your Articulation.” Another way of saying that is: “Word Choice has behavioral consequences.”

Here is how I say it –
Words mean things. Learn how to use them well.

Want more direction on having meaningful conversations with your kids:

5 Creative Writing Exercises for Kids of All Ages – Perfect for Summer

I have had the privilege of working with moms all over the country who are helping other mothers do a better job. These women have written and spoken on just about everything mothering.

A few years ago, Jenny Wise wrote an article for my homeschool site on how to help kids enjoy writing. Enjoying writing is essential no matter how your children are being educated. As a mom of seven, I had a few that weren’t keen on writing, and Jenny’s ideas would have been helpful.

No matter what age or writing skill set, your child is, age-adaptable exercises refine communication abilities. Here are five creative writing methods children will enjoy while honing their writing talents. You can use them when traveling in the car while on vacation, for family activities, or on a rainy afternoon. Summer is a perfect time to begin honing writing skills for the upcoming school year. If you have no-tech time in your home, which is a good idea, then that open space is the perfect time for some creative writing. : )

1. Prompt Them to Think Critically
Present a unique situation to your child, have them analyze how they’d act in the situation, and ask them to write down their thoughts regarding what they’re presented with. Use writing prompts that ask children questions such as, “If you were a superhero, what would be your kryptonite? Why?” challenge them to evaluate their personal life and effectively communicate it to a reader. Thought-provoking questions paired with writing exercises may also incite positive behavior changes depending on the question.

2. Have Them Feature Characters They’re Familiar With
Have your children write a story starring their favorite movie or television character. Stories could range from a “day in the life” tale, to a letter written from that character’s perspective back to your child. Another option is for your children to write a narrative featuring multiple characters they’re familiar with and have them describe their interactions.

3. Use a Word Jar to Spur Ideas
Put dozens of age-appropriate words into a jar. Choose three at random, and have your children write a story that is inspired by and must use all three words. You could also segment multiple jars with different word categories, such as people, places, and objects, and choose one word from each jar to use.

4. Get Them a Journal
More than 20 years of journaling research reported by The University of Texas at Austin found daily journaling about emotions strengthened immune systems, generated better grades, and improved mental health. Journaling may also benefit working memory, decrease anxiety and enhance sleep and social connections. Shop together with your children so they can pick out a journal they want with lines that allow them to write comfortably. Guarantee its confidentiality and empower them to write outside the confines of reality and explore how they imagine their future.

5. Put Them in Charge of the Tale
Search for popular titles of films, books, or songs your child has never encountered, and ask them to write a story conveying what the title is about. Encourage creative expression through various methods, such as poetry or songwriting. Play them instrumental music and have them write song lyrics based on what they’ve heard.

Participate in these activities with your children, so they have a supportive, creative writing mentor as they’re working. You could also create stories together, taking turns adding to the narrative. Remember, creativity is the focus. While pointing out errors such as spelling and grammar can be beneficial for accuracy, consider spotlighting the creative elements to encourage them to have fun and embrace creative writing as a hobby that benefits their education.

Make a place in your family activities for writing and help your children

succeed as adults.

Raising Financially Literate Kids: Tips to Help You Navigate the Financial Journey of Parenthood

It can be tiresome and overwhelming to constantly explain the intricacies of money to your children. Even if you’re a seasoned parent, you might still be unsure of how to talk to your kids about finances. But don’t worry—there’s no right or wrong way to approach the issue. As long as you’re feeling genuine and honest with them, your kids will understand that you’re just looking out for their best interests.

Even as early as age 3, kids begin to understand that money equals security. So, the earlier you can begin discussing finances with your kids, the better. My husband and I didn’t know much about money management when we had our seven children. We flew by the seat of our pants and that didn’t work out as well for us as some knowledge about budgeting, saving, and investing would have. It also made it more difficult for our children as they moved into adulthood. BUT there is a wealth of great information and useful strategies out there now that can help you navigate better than Don and I did and will help your children manage money better. Laura Pearson and I teamed up to offer you some strategies that can help you navigate the financial journey of parenthood. Laura Pearson is passionate about teaching the younger generation. Edutude was built to share resources on how to keep children engaged and in love with learning.

Plan Ahead

When you know you’re going to have kids, start planning for their future financial health as soon as possible. This may seem like a daunting task, but it doesn’t have to be. With a little bit of research and effort, you can create a financial plan for your family that will help your kids understand money and make smart decisions from an early age.

One of the best ways to start planning for your children’s future finances is by creating a family budget. This doesn’t have to be an all-or-nothing approach—you can start by breaking down large purchases (like a house, car, or vacation) into smaller monthly amounts.

Money Under 30 notes that this will give you a much better understanding of your family’s financial situation, as well as give your kids a better sense of how much money they will have at the end of each month.

Make a Budget

One of the best ways to teach your kids about money is by showing them. As discussed above, breaking down large purchases into smaller amounts can help you better understand your family’s financial situation, as well as give your kids a better sense of how much money they will have at the end of each month.

Another important way to show your kids is by creating a budget together. While creating a budget can be a bit tedious, the more you do it, the easier it will get. Once you have your budget in place, try to stick to it as best you can.

This not only helps you understand your own spending habits but it also gives you insight into how your family can be better stewards of money.

Finally, it’s never too late to teach kids about business. Budgeting skills come into play here, as well. While there are many ways to acquire startup capital, your young entrepreneur must know how to allocate these funds for success.

Teach Financial Habits

One of the best ways to teach your kids about money is by modeling financial literacy behavior. This is why it’s important to regularly take the time to talk to your kids about money—both when you’re together and when you’re apart.

Regularly talking about finances shows your kids that you trust them to learn about money on their own. Plus, it gives you a chance to go over any topics you’ve neglected, as well as introduce new ones.

Lastly, when it comes to modeling financial literacy habits, there are a few key things to keep in mind:

●Start early: Lifehack suggests modeling financial habits as early as possible by talking to your kids about how finances work and what is important to remember.
●Be consistent: Make sure to follow through by regularly talking about finances, acting as a good example, and modeling financial literacy habits.
●Have open-minded discussions: Don’t be afraid to have open-minded and constructive discussions about money with your kids.

With these tips in hand, you’ll be better equipped to raise financially literate kids.

A lot of peace of mind comes with this, as you know you’re doing all you can to set them up for success in life now and in the future.

Image via Pexels 

Sparks Bring Learning to Life!

What Are Sparks?

I have talked about children’s ‘SPARKS’ in numerous articles and in my book, Becoming A Present Parent. In fact, the issue of Sparks came up in last week’s comments – Can Children LOVE Learning?  What’s a Spark, you may ask? Well, a Spark is anything that a child says or does that lets you know they’re interested in something right now. Sparks are valuable regardless of how you choose to educate your children.

My daughter Kate is not a homeschooling mom. However, last year, due to Covid, she became one. It isn’t something she plans to continue doing. But she, like most moms, is interested in teaching her children about life, core values, people, events, and other worthwhile topics. This type of learning occurs well in the family and home. Recently, Kate shared a person of interest with her children, Tessa and Elliott – Lily Hevesh,  @hevesh5  a well-known domino artist. Elliott and Tessa have been in love with dominos for years. Tessa and Elliott were intrigued by this woman artist and what she had accomplished. For well over an hour, they worked on their own domino creations. My daughter sent me photos and included these words – ‘Light a spark and watch it burn!’ I loved it because those are my words. I didn’t even know she was paying attention to them. : )

If we keep our eyes open, we will notice what interests our children. We will see what is ‘sparking ‘them right now. That is the thing to hone in on and help your children with, whether it is getting materials they need,  teaching them about a famous person who also has that Spark, or giving them space to experiment and create a mess.

HOW TO SEE SPARKS

A. Be Present. Do you want to know the number one way to see and hear your child’s Sparks? BE PRESENT. When we’re Present in all the mundane moments of a family’s day, we will see and hear what we may have missed up until now.

It’s hard to see Sparks if your head is filled with your schedule or if you’re engrossed in your technology. It’s hard to ‘see’ if you’re trying to avoid becoming involved or prevent a mess. You can’t see if you’re so busy working that the Spark appears to be an irritation or problem.

B. Ask good questions. You can jump-start your ability to see your children’s Sparks by asking yourself questions:
• What activity do you have to make them stop doing to get them to eat or go to sleep?
• What activity are they doing when they seem most engaged and alive?
• When they get to choose what to do on a free afternoon, what activity do they choose?
• What did they love to do when they were three years old? Five years old?
• What are they currently doing that bugs you?
• What do they do that’s making a mess?
• What do they collect?

C. Have mini-conversations.
• Share your Sparks, and they may share theirs
• Say “You’re very good at this”
• Say “You seem interested in this”
• Say, “This appears to make you happy/excited.”
• Ask, “Have you ever thought of . . . .”
• Say, “I had a great day today.”
• At dinner, ask “What was the best part of your day?” and have each person share

Pay attention to what keeps coming up over and over again in their answers and their conversations.

When we are in tune with what interests our children now, we can watch them experience joy just as Kate watched it happen for her children. Let others know how to do it too. : )

Can Children LOVE Learning?

For many families, school has begun in earnest. Whether you are using the public system, a private system, or homeschooling, September usually means we are deep into it. Some years back, I wrote an article about how to help children remain lifelong learners, to become lovers of learning.

As I reread it, I was reminded of the value of helping our children love learning new things, to not be intimidated by what they do not already know. We don’t have total control if we use the public system or a private system to educate our kids. However, we always have control over what happens in our homes and between our children and us.

Homeschool parents are not immune to things that can take away a child’s love of learning. So often, there is the pressure to make sure our kids are up to par because parents may feel the need to prove they aren’t ‘ruining’ their kids. I have homeschooled, and I know that pressure!

I feel the information is as pertinent today as it was when I first wrote it. I hope you enjoy the read and that it gives you an idea or two that you can institute into your home to help your kids become lifelong learners by choice.

“But I must again repeat it, that the great secret of education lies in finding out the proper means of making young minds fall in love with useful researches…”
-George Turnbull, Observations upon Liberal Education, written in 1742

This is an interesting premise. If we can discern how to help children fall in love with learning, they can receive an excellent education because they want to.

I believe this love of learning comes naturally to children. I’m sure you have observed how children learn. Just watch a baby learning to use their hands. They are not discouraged by how long it takes to gain mastery over the hand. They just keep working at it. No one tries to help a baby learn to use their hands. We just watch them and encourage them and let them work it out. The same goes for learning to hold a spoon, walking, putting on a shirt, etc. We provide the spoon and the shirt and support and encouragement, but basically, let them work it out.

Watch an eight-year-old building a fort. They are dogged when it comes to a project like this and, if left to their own devices, will figure it out and enjoy every bit of the process. The finished product may leave a bit to be desired in our adult minds, but the child will be thrilled with his effort.

Herein lies part of the problem of maintaining a love of learning. The parent might comment on the unsafe condition of the floor or walls; how many nails they used, what of this or that could be better, the pile of accumulated debris. Then the comment, “Here, let me help you with this.” Both teachers and parents must be careful not to damage a child’s confidence in their efforts to help. They also need to be cautious about sending the ‘you didn’t really do a good job’ message.

Sometimes parents have a fear that their child might be left behind, in some way found wanting, or not be able to compete in the adult world effectively. Often, if children march to a different drummer, it makes us nervous. Occasionally a child doesn’t fit on the usual timeline for learning something, such as reading or math.

Our eagerness to help them can sometimes do more harm than good. If we are too energetic in our efforts, we can even cause a ‘hate of learning.’ We often fall into this trap regarding the ‘academic’ subjects or things that cause us inconvenience. School teachers are not immune to these same errors. Pushing too hard and criticism make loving a new skill or topic difficult for kids.

Ten Ways to Foster a Love of Learning

So, what are some ways that we can encourage learning in any subject, even academics, without squashing the child’s own natural desire to learn?

1. Provide a safe and loving atmosphere for learning, more support, less pressure. Safer support would have helped me when it came to math. I loved math, but I was terrible at it. The harder the adults pushed, the more challenging it was to learn. It seemed to slow down my brain. Later, as an adult, I realized that I had a learning difficulty. I wish I had felt supported and safe when it came to math but I, instead, felt judged.

2. Provide inspiring materials. Expose children to inspiring music, great art, good books, etc. When I was of middle school age and into high school, I was teased by my friends because I read all the wrong stuff. That is because my dad had so many great books. I couldn’t help myself. What my friends were reading seemed lame. : )

My mother sang beautifully. She didn’t sing opera, but she played it, and she sang songs from Broadway. I didn’t listen to the same music as my peers. Yes, they did think I was a bit odd, but I had been exposed to the beauty of literature, art, and music. It changed how I saw the world.

If you want help exposing your kids to great art and literature, check out this excellent website. The Well Educated Heart (aka Libraries of Hope) is a restoration of stories from the golden age of children’s literature. Marlene Peterson has reconnected the modern generation of parents and children to the classic but forgotten stories that have instilled virtue and character in the hearts of generations past.

3. Read as a family on a regular, consistent basis. Reading as a family has great benefits. Even now, when my family consists of three people over seventy, I have written about the huge impact our family reading has had. This one thing will make a difference in your family and your children’s love of learning.

4. Inspire curiosity and then leave them to the wonder of experimentation and self-discovery. My grandson, Ben, loves this! Let them, experiment, fail, make a mess, etc. It leads to learning.

5. Leave plenty of time for thinking, playing, and being with family. Avoid too many lessons, clubs, and classes that adults manage. I have often written of the value of being at home, together, talking, reading, and playing. It takes effort to make this happen in our busy world of technology, but you will be well rewarded for the effort. Gotta put away the phone for at least a couple of hours each week. It takes dedication on a parent’s part, but you can do it. I’ve seen it.

6. Remember that play is the work of children. Encourage your kids to go outside and be in nature. Let them work stuff out together without adult supervision. Experiment with time off from technology. Organized sports and clubs don’t count. When kids are free to play and use their imagination, it does a body good.

7. Be patient with the learning process. I know I would have had a better outcome with math if those who taught me and those at home who felt responsible for my learning, would have been more patient with my timeline. I had a learning difficulty. Back in those days, we didn’t even know what that was. But there was such a push to move me along with everyone else that it became harder and harder to learn.

8. Learn to recognize and respond to Sparks. Sparks tell you what your child is interested in right now and may develop a passion for later. They are usually the things that bug you or make a mess. However, if you follow your child’s lead, you can both have a remarkable learning opportunity together.

9. Enjoy learning yourself. I read because my dad read and made books available. My mom read to us. She played all kinds of music and sang for us. My mom and dad taught themselves to run several brick-and-mortar businesses. They were always learning something new. It helped me be brave and willing to learn new things This example has served me well! Right now, at 71, I am learning Spanish!

10. Share what you are learning with your children. I would have loved to have more conversations with my mom and dad about what they were doing, reading, and learning. I know it would have helped me, but their example was all they could give at the time. So, give your children a bit more. Let them know what you are learning about.

When we safeguard this natural love of learning, we set the child on the road to success when they are ready for deeper levels of knowledge. They will be prepared to flourish in high school and college studies. They will do as George Turnbull suggests; they will seek out an excellent education.

Send these tips along to your friends who have to deal with the pressures of school, any type of school. They will thank you for it. : ) 

School in Limbo? Here’s Help!

In our district, kids are going back to school only two days a week. WHAT!! That will leave a lot of parents with kids who want to do something fun and connect, as well as learn. Here is something that will help you out! : )

I began teaching and speaking over a decade ago. I focused on a learning tool that, at that time, was called The Closet. The printer said he loved my Closet Mastery Course but had to look inside because he wondered if I was training people to come out of the Closet. It also seemed odd to call this tool The Closet and then tell people they can use a box, a bag, or any old container that they would like – or even no container. So, the name was changed to The Spark Station.

When I began teaching this tool, my audience was almost exclusively homeschooling parents. The Spark Station initially helped kids want to learn so that the homeschool process would be less stressful. However, over the years, I realized what a fantastic, fun, and engaging tool it was for connection. My message morphed and eventually became a book, Becoming a Present Parent: How to Connect With Your Children In five Minutes or Less. 

The Spark Station has lived beyond homeschool because

it’s a beautiful way to ‘play’ and connect with kids. This is a boon for adults like me, who are a little play adverse.

Years ago, I created a 13-audio course about the Spark Station. This year I have offered the entire thing to all my readers FREE. It is in its original homeschool format, but all principles, rules of engagement, and outcomes apply broadly across the parenting spectrum. Over the next few months, I will create a multi-part series of articles on the Spark Station to help you use it in your home. It’s WONDERFUL, FUN, and EXCITING for kids! It is useful for toddlers, children, and teens.

The Spark Station – Part 1 What is The Spark Station

I used to say, “So what is the definition of the Spark Station? Simply put, it is a space where parents have put items that they think will inspire their children to explore further and learn.” Then I had a mom tell me she was on audio five before she finally understood what The Spark Station was.

Now I say it differently. The Spark Station is a tool you can create. It can be an actual closet or a box, a dresser, or any other place you can put new items to share with your children. It’s not the same as a storage space where you keep your learning materials, books, and craft items. Its purpose is to create a time and place when your children will be exposed to new and exciting ideas or be able to engage in things that already interest them, and where parents connect with their kids. It’s a time and space where both adults and kids can share what they feel joy or passion in, and what interests them, their SPARKS. I’ll share information on how powerful SPARKS can be.

You can use the Spark Station at a set time each week, say on a Sunday afternoon. You can also use it anytime you feel like it. You can use it as part of your school day if you homeschool. Dad can use it to connect after long days at work. However, it is not to be used by children alone because you want your own time. It’s important to remember that it is a connection tool and that can’t happen if you are occupied elsewhere. Another important thing is that when kids use it alone, it turns into a mess quickly, and then no one uses it. This is one of the five critical rules which I will cover in another article.

What I want to accomplish here is to encourage you to begin listening to the FREE course. If you don’t have time for a 13-audio course, then view this one audio. It will give you enough information to determine if this is something you want to have in your ‘connection’ arsenal. Or you can read each installment of the series of articles titles Spark Station Basics as they are published.

I’ll end today with some pictures of Spark Stations. You will see how diverse they are and how fun they look. : ) You will notice that they are large and small, fancy and simple, for little kids and big kids. They are all different!

But before I show the pictures, here is a letter from a mom who took the leap and gave it a shot. 

“The  Spark Station and The Spark Station Mastery Course really work! I just had to share my experience with all of you. I finished lesson 5 of the Spark Station Mastery Course yesterday. I went through my home to see what I could find. I cleaned out the entertainment center (that is what we are using for our Spark Station). I was excited but nervous.

‘I found sand in the garage that I forgot we had, rice, material, art supplies, wooden blocks, Lincoln Logs, math wrap-ups, and the list goes on. I filled totes with the items I wanted to start with. The kids saw me doing this and were anxious to know when they could use all that cool stuff.

‘I dyed the sand; I dyed the rice, and I put the stuff in the Spark Station this morning. We did our devotional, and then we talked about how the Spark Station would work. I was really nervous.

‘The kids immediately went to the fabric and wanted to make capes. Unfortunately, the pieces we had were rather small, so we talked about using those pieces for other things and talked about how much fabric we will need to make a cape (it will appear in the Spark Station soon).

‘Then they found the colored sand, mason jars, and lids that I had in there. They used the funnel in the box to help pour sand into the jars and make beautiful designs with different colored layers of sand. While the older three were working with the sand, I pulled out the rice tub and set it up on a blanket. I had spoons, cups, bowls, etc. in with the rice. I just let it sit there, and as soon as my 18-month-old saw it, he was occupied until The older kids went to play with him when they finished.

‘When they bored with the rice, my older son pulled out the art box. He found cupcake liners in the box. Immediately the girls wanted some too. They asked me what they could use them for, and I told them anything they wanted. They seemed unsure; I told them I could see making a pretty flower. My son immediately said he wasn’t going to make a flower; he thought his would make a great head for a lion. They glued their cupcake liners to the paper and used the chalk in the box to draw the rest of their pictures.

‘I just sat there and grinned the entire time. I couldn’t believe how easy it was. Why was I so afraid of this, it’s not scary, it’s incredible? I now have a…tool at my fingertips that gives me the perfect way to my kids. I can’t wait for tomorrow, and neither can my children.” Stacey S.

Please take a look at The Spark Station Mastery Course; it’s FREE.

Does your family have a good way to connect and do you use it consistently?

How would it impact your family if you added this one thing – consistent family play for connection?

Focus on what ties you together and your family can never fall apart. family.lovetoknow.com                                                       

It’s Not Education or a Degree That Thrills Me

Sometimes Bad Things Happen to Good People

Recently, my 45-year-old son graduated from college with a bachelor’s in philosophy. It wasn’t easy because he has a past that could have made it impossible.

When Seth was a small boy, he had some experiences which hurt his heart and soul. Sometimes, no matter how carefully we try to guard our children bad things can happen. This set him on a troubled road. He used drugs, dropped out of high school, went to jail, and was sentenced to the D.O.C. (Department of Corrections) and a work-release program. He stole some cigarettes from a closed gas station and received a felony that would make life hard.

The future looked poor. However, he was a good person, as most of us are. When his son was born, he decided to make a change. It wasn’t easy because of the past. People weren’t sure they could trust him and so they didn’t want to risk giving him a chance. He just kept looking and eventually, he found a man and a company that employed him. He worked in an underground mine running a huge haul truck and eventually became an underground miner.

However, after just a couple of years, his body wouldn’t take the shaking and jolting of the machine any longer and he was back on the hunt. He was hired at a scrap mental company sorting metal.

Setting the Goal and Sticking With It

Seth had a goal to make something of his life so he could be an example for his son and he became one of the BEST scrap mental sorters they had. Eventually, he was promoted and found himself running the front office involving the 20-ton scale and the selling and buying of scrap metals. Then during the market collapse of 2007, Seth was laid off.

He eventually found a job as a machinist and was promoted after a couple of years to the position of Quality Management Systems Specialist creating a Quality Management System training program and taught it to the employees at his plant and others in the state. This was the job that changed the direction of his life. He began to believe that he was smart enough and capable of returning to school.

While Seth was working at the mine, he developed a love for rocks and minerals. He studied them and began collecting them. He also learned to pan gold and joined an online club of like-minded people. Eventually, this love of rocks and minerals got him thinking about college. He determined to become a geologist. But he was pushing 40 and he had a felony on his record. He bravely decided to go for it.

At the University of MT, Seth did what he had done at the scrap metal job and as a machinist. He moved up. He impressed his professors and counselors and they asked him to mentor ‘at risk’ college students. His efforts were so effective that he was often able to keep all his mentees in college. He taught some classes. He was making a difference as he pursued his own goals.

All these opportunities moved him from seeking a degree as a geologist to getting a degree in philosophy. What a major jump!

We didn’t put Seth through school. He worked his way through! It wasn’t easy. I can remember times when he called me in tears seeking encouragement. He thought about quitting. After all, he was going to be 45 by the time he was done. It seemed indomitable at times!

This spring Seth accomplished his goal and graduated with a degree in Philosophy.

Anyone Can Build a Meaningful Life!

There is a purpose in my sharing Seth’s journey with you other than a mother’s bragging rights. It’s not the education or the degree that thrills me. It’s that he was kind to himself, trusted himself, set a goal and then accomplished it.

The reason that I find that so magnificently thrilling is that when we can set a goal and stick with it, no matter how hard, then we can always take care of ourselves and others. We can always make, not just a living, but a life. Way to go Seth!!

P.S. Currently Seth is pursuing setting up a program to coach troubled youth. He understands that you can’t just take kids out of bad situations. You must help them be kind to themselves, trust themselves, set a goal and then accomplish it. You must change how they think.

If you know someone who needs to be reminded that they can make a life,
please share this article. : )

Why Does a Work Ethic Matter?

My grandpa Ted, hard worker, entrepreneur, and teacher

Learning The Value of Work

It was early in the 1960’s and I was seated in a red vinyl chair, the kind you would have seen in a 1940’s dinner. I was waiting for a customer and I knew one would come. One always came when my grandpa took a break and headed out the front door to the Golden Spur Café next door.

I was about 10 and my responsibility was to measure the feet of tall cowboys and grizzled farmers. Then I would show them fancy riding boots, a good working cowboy boot or maybe a steel-toed work boot.

I had been measuring men’s feet since I was about 8 years old, every time my grandpa took a break. I had never yet sold a boot but I had shown a good many cowboys a good many boots.

What I didn’t know at the time was that my grandpa was sending those cowboys and farmers over to give me experience. When I stayed at my grandparents during the summer this was my daily routine.

At night I would find myself behind the counter in my Grandma’s Sweet Shop. My grandma had only a

My grandma Roselia, hard worker, entrepreneur and teacher

fourth-grade education but she had taught herself what she needed to know to run a successful business for many years. It was right next to the theater and in those days there were no concessions inside the theater. You had to come to my grandma’s Sweet Shop to get them.

After a movie or the high school football game people come in for lime rickeys, an ice cream soda or a foot long hot dog with her famous and very secret sauce. I washed root beer mugs and ice cream dishes but occasionally I had the privilege of selling popcorn and candy. It was a delicious experience, no pun intended!

Verl and NaVon, my parents, hard workers, entrepreneurs and teachers

My dad was a hard worker and an entrepreneur too. He did many things and then went back to college when he had nine children. I learned the meaning of that word in high school but although I didn’t know the word till then I knew what one was. It was a person who owned their own business; who kept the books and hired people and paid the bills and sometimes got paid very little. I knew it was somebody who was always thinking up new ideas and putting them to work. It was a person who knew how to work hard and do it well. It was a person who could earn what they needed to care for themselves.

My mom was busy raising nine children but she was an entrepreneur too. She took in ironing from the neighbors. She used those meager funds to buy us Christmas, trips to the fair and the occasional pack of hot dogs for dinner. What a treat!

I learned about entrepreneurship and the value of work by being involved with my dad, mom, and

Me, learning the value of work, entrepreneurship and doing a job well

grandparents from my earliest days. This call to work and to do it well became part of my personal value system. It served me so well when I was putting myself through college and when I entered the workforce and on into my parenting days.

Learning to work paid off in many ways. I was able to do my chores well when properly motivated. : ) I got my homework done and I knew that doing it well mattered. No one ever bailed me out if I chose to do a poor job or to be late in getting an assignment done. I knew that if I needed something there was work I could to earn the money.

I became an entrepreneur myself despite being a stay at home mom raising seven children. I taught myself to make wedding cakes and did a fabulous job from my kitchen counter for fifty years. Many of our family perks came from those wedding cakes.

My children couldn’t help but develop a strong work ethic themselves. I will never forget the summer my five-year-old Jodie set up a rock selling business. She collected rocks on the side of the road and went door to door selling them. She sold some too. Her next venture was a large cardboard box christened “Junky Jimbo’s” (don’t ask me where she got that name!!) on the corner of a busy street where she sold lemonade. And so it went with all of my children.

Understanding the value of work has been passed down to my grandchildren. They know that if they want something then there is a way to get it; come up with an idea and then go to work. My grandchildren have been babysitters, dog walkers, poop scoopers, pet sitters, vacation gardeners, tattoo sellers, magic boat sellers, cool bib sellers, creators of events for families, tickets 25 cents, lemonade sellers, newspaper deliverers, lawn cutters and now I have a granddaughter, just out of high school, who is working in a dental office. She’s saving to serve a mission for her church this summer.

WORK Develops Important Character Traits In Kids

Children reap many advantages when they learn to work. Work is key to developing important character traits.

  • self-motivation
  • integrity
  • determination
  • consistency
  • confidence
  • persistence
  • judgment
  • personal satisfaction
  • confidence
  • the ability to use and value self-denial

We don’t have to run our own business to help our children reap the advantages of having a strong work ethic. When we teach our children to work and do the very best job they can we give them gifts that will be of inestimable value when they become adults.

Next week we’ll take a look at some ways that we can encourage our children to work and do it well.

Your shares are the best compliment. : )