Category: Sparks

SPARKS – The BIG Win!

Last week I shared information about Sparks and how valuable they can be in building child-parent relationships. I also shared my big failure when it came to one of my grandsons Sparks. Let’s have a quick review.

In my book Becoming a Present Parent  I wrote that the value of seeing your child’s Sparks is that it’s a wonderful way to get Present with your child. It’s powerful not only in helping them love learning but also in creating tighter relationships. So, what is a Spark? Simply put, a Spark is anything that a child says or does that lets you know they’re interested in something right now.

Last week I told you that over the next couple of months, I would randomly share examples of Sparks, how fun they can be, and how connecting. Today, I want to share a BIG win. This, like the fail, took place in 2012.

The Octopi Spark

Ring! Ring! “Hello.” “Grandma, I want to learn about octopuses.” When there is a “spark” you have to jump on it. Remember my elephant fiasco?

What is octopus plural?

According to Merriam-Webster, throughout history the word “octopus” has been pluralized as octopuses, octopi, and the more unusual octopodes. Any of the three options is fine proving that grammar isn’t always black and white. This is a fact that we learned while engaging in Jack’s Spark, octopuses. Jack, Maggie, Mary, and I thought you would like to know. : )

Books, books, books! We always start with books when following a Spark. My grands love books and books about octopuses were no exception.

This was the funniest thing we learned in our books – The octopus has a squirter (siphon or funnel) and he uses it to shoot backward. We practiced sucking in air, and then shooting it out as fast as we could and letting our hands shoot backward. Mary loved it, Jack was a bit unnerved, and Maggie just laughed.

Want a few more amazing facts to help kids learn about octopuses?

  • An octopus can open a jar lid to get at the food inside.
  • The octopus has a parrot-like beak – yikes and he isn’t even a bird!
  • An octopus has eight arms and no legs.
  • An octopus has no bones so it can wiggle into very tiny spaces.
  • An octopus hunts for food at night.
  • If an octopus is under attack it can squirt a cloud of black ink and get away.
  • Moray eels like to bite off octopus arms for lunch!
  • An octopus can change its color from black to white to red.
  • An octopus can change the texture of its body so it is hard to find.
  • An octopus’s home or lair is called a midden.

I love crafts that cost no money and use what I already have on hand. In this case. we used toilet paper rolls, construction paper, tape, wiggle eyes, and stickers. We created our own octopi and the grands had a grand time. No pun intended. I have given you instructions below so that you can help your kids make their own octopi. Last week I shared that you can light a Spark and use it the same as if it originated with the child.

Please notice Jack’s face. Because I jumped on this Spark he was fully involved. He enjoyed every minute we spent together.

As usual, we ended our activity with another very silly book about an octopus who almost became soup. The pictures were funny and Maggie, who is 5 ½, with cerebral palsy, laughed and laughed at the silly things that went on.

I must confess that we did not eat any octopus for lunch! We found chocolate teddy grahams, cheese, and hot dogs much more satisfying.

We had a wonderful time together laughing and learning. It was a fun Spark and we loved being together.

MAKE AN OCTOPUS

1. Cut the toilet paper roll in half. Measure it on your construction paper and draw a pencil line.

2. Cut eight strips (arms) from the edge of the paper to the pencil line.

3. Glue or tape the construction paper to the toilet paper roll with the arms hanging down.

4. Roll the arms on a pencil or marker so they curl up.

Books About Octopi

  • Octopuses by Michele Spirn
  • The Octopus by Mary M. Cerullo
  • Octopus soup by Mercer Meyer
  • Cowboy and Octopus by Jon Scieszka – I do not like this book but Maggie (5 1/2) laughed uproariously!
  • Octopuses, Squids, and Their Relatives by Beth Blaxland
  • Octopuses by Carol K. Lindeen
  • An Octopus is Anoying by Patricia Lauber
  • Gentle Giant Octopuses by Karen Wallace
  • My Very Own Octopus by Bernard Most
  • An Octopuses Garden by Stephanie Steve-Borden
  • Octopus Socktopus by Nick Sharratt
  • Have You Ever Seen an Octopus with a Broom by Etta Kaner

Watch for Sparks from your littles to your teens. Sparks will help you listen, enjoy, and bond.

SPARKS – The Big Fail!

Years ago, I spent a great deal of time with my grands that live in Utah. We lived one block away. This was before we consolidated our two families into a three-generation home. My daughter, Jodie, was homeschooling. At that time, I was teaching and mentoring mothers who homeschooled. Then I made a transition. I realized that many of the excellent things I was teaching applied to a whole spectrum of parenting, not just those who homeschooled.

Over the ensuing years, I have shared many of the lessons I taught to those long ago homeschool moms and have demonstrated how they apply to every family.

One of those lessons was the idea of Sparks. I wrote my first article on this cool subject in April of 2010. Wow, that was a long time ago. I love the idea of Sparks and have written many articles on the subject since then. In that early article, Sparks Bring Learning to Life. I explained what a Spark is and how it can help you, as a parent, help your child love the idea of learning. This is certainly valuable if you homeschool, but equally valuable if your children attend public or private school. Life is about learning, and the best-lived lives happen when we continue to learn. It is helpful when we show our children how fun learning can be and that is done best when we respond to their Sparks, the things they are already interested in.

In my book Becoming a Present Parent  I wrote that the value of seeing your child’s Sparks is that it’s a wonderful way to get Present with your child. It’s powerful not only in helping them love learning but also in creating tighter relationships. So, what is a Spark? Simply put, a Spark is anything that a child says or does that lets you know they’re interested in something right now. The article mentioned above will teach you how to recognize a Spark and then how to use it to create fun, family-learning moments, and to solidify your parent-child relationship.

Over the next few months, I want to share some examples of how I, and other parents, were able to use Sparks to connect with our kids. They are fun ideas that you can incorporate with your children, even if they haven’t shown up as a Spark, because you can also ignite Sparks. Light a spark and watch it burn!

Besides, it’s nice to have a quiver of ideas in your back pocket, especially with summer right around the corner and the sometimes boring days it brings. Learning slows down and tech takes over. It is useful to have some fun ideas and then gather your kids around for some non-tech enjoyment. We are talking about kids under twelve, but occasionally teens will hang around and even join in.

One of the reasons I’m going to tackle this issue of Sparks in the next couple of months is because I’m going to be spending LOTS of time caring for my grands. I fly to Seattle for a week, mid-month, where my grands range in age from almost twelve to four. Then it’s on to Colorado for a week. These grands range in age from married with kids, down to age four. I need a reminder, because as I see Sparks, I can respond, and our time together will be more powerful.

The article I am sharing this week was written in late 2011 and is about an epic failure in the Sparks arena. It illustrates the number one thing to remember about Sparks – the younger the child the shorter the Sparks shelf life. So when a Spark pops up you need to be prepared to respond. When you do, the results are amazing. Next week I will share a success.

Oh yes, one other thing. When children know you care about what they care about, regardless of the age of the child, they will open up because they know you care and will respond. This goes a long way in the relationship department, especially with teens.

CHILDREN LEARN BEST WHEN INTEREST IS HIGH

I go to the library once a month and get four weeks worth of material to share with my grands. On my last trip to the library, I got books about pre-math subjects. That’s where my focus was. However, Jack’s was on elephants.

Each week I visit my grands with my recognizable plastic bucket filled with interesting items. Two weeks earlier, when the bucket went visiting Jack said, “Hi grandma, you brought the bucket. I asked him if he knew what we were going to do that day and he got a huge grin on his face and said, “Yes, elephants.” I pulled out the contents and we had a fun afternoon, but no elephants were included.

The next week when I arrived, I asked Jack, “What do you think we are going to learn about today.” With a huge grin and a face that was lit with the sure knowledge that he knew, he yelled, “Elephants”. I knew right then that it should have been elephants. I had missed my opportunity to respond when the Spark was fresh.

When Jack said he wanted to learn about elephants he fully expected that he would find the materials available the next week. I could see his disappointment when it was something else. We had fun but I sensed he wasn’t fully enthusiastic because what he wanted to know about was elephants.

This last week I was prepared with information about elephants. Guess what – I had let the window of opportunity pass by! We did have fun, but I could see that the enthusiasm he had had two weeks earlier was not present. Imagine how joyous would have been our experience if I had materials about elephants the week before. It would have made a difference.

I am going to spill it and tell you why I didn’t have things going well when it came to elephants. Frankly, the first week I missed it. I heard him say elephants and I let it pass right through my head. I didn’t want to go to the library again, I wanted to use what I already had prepared, and I was excited about the pre-math stuff. Then I forgot about elephants until the next week when Jack’s happy, anticipation-filled face reminded me. I had been thinking about my needs and not Jack, so I had completely missed the Spark.

When I did show up with elephants in the basket on the third week it was fun, but Jack wasn’t as engaged as he sometimes is, and we didn’t do half of what I had prepared. The younger the child, the more important it is to hear and respond to a spark quickly. They move from one interest to another fast.

Tips to help you respond to your child’s Sparks

  • Have a consistent place to make notes to yourself. When Jack mentioned elephants, I should have written it down or noted it in my phone, so I wouldn’t forget. If the Spark requires a trip to the museum etc., you need help to remember because it will require planning. Although we should respond to a Spark as soon as we can, occasionally time will pass so have a way to remind yourself.
  • If you can’t make it to the library for books, then use the internet. It will only take 10 minutes max to print off a page of info. that you can read and prepare in your mind, as well as a few pictures. You can also all gather at the computer. Then while you share the pictures you can ask questions and slip in some facts. There are always craft ideas and cute lunch and snack ideas online for just about any subject. There are free worksheets and color pages online for any topic you can think of, including elephants. Add another 5 minutes and you can have those downloaded and printed.
  • Take another 10-15 minutes to gather your materials for crafts and plan snacks so that you can introduce something fun over the next few days. I always use what I have. I rarely make a special trip to the store. I am averse to buying when I can make do. So, if I need a straw and I don’t have one I call my husband and he stops at Wendy’s after work. If I need a feather and I don’t have one, I make one from paper. If I need sliced turkey and I don’t have it, I figure out how to make peanut butter or tuna work. In 30 min. or so, you can have wonderful ideas that work for a week or two, that help you respond to your child’s Spark. They will love that you noticed. And this works in reverse. You can use this 30 minutes on something you would like them to be interested in and they may be Sparked.
  • If you have things to do and don’t we all put them on hold for 30 minutes and respond to the spark, even if it’s only a short conversation, reading a short book online, or asking them questions. Your child will be excited and much more engaged.
  • Most of all, remember that seeing Sparks is about seeing your children’s interests and needs. When you begin using these strategies you create magic and children learn to love learning.
  • Catching Sparks is usually easy, but responding to them is a skill we develop over time. So don’t become discouraged when you have a fail like I did with the elephants. Just keep practicing.

‘Light a spark and watch it burn!’