Promo Code: PRESENTPARENT19
This was inspiring. I learned far more than I had planned. I have been reminded that what matters most is the connection I make with my children. Julie M.
I know your story because it was my story.
Everyone’s situation is slightly different, but the results are the same.
You go to bed feeling as if you didn’t do a good job as a parent today. You feel as if you let your kids down.
Oh, you made meals, you went to work, kissed an owie, helped with homework, and you probably got some things off your to-do list. But…
It’s that feeling that somehow you just didn’t connect with your children. Did you hug anyone today? Did you talk about anything besides chores, homework and not being rude? Did you yell more than you planned? Did resentment of the very people you love the most creep in.
So here you are, sleepless, wondering if you’re ever going to get the thing that really matters in order – the relationship with your children.
Is it possible to connect with your children in meaningful ways every day when the world is so busy and there are so many things that are required just to keep your family going?
Is it possible to let your children know they matter, every day, with something better than mere words?
Is there really a way to connect doing what you must do as a mom or dad – No extra time required?
you’ve gone to bed more times than you want to, feeling as if you’ve fallen short in the parenting department.
So, if there’s an answer to this 21st-century conundrum, what is it and why didn’t I know about it and why don’t you?
By the end of this, you’re going to discover that there are some simple, right in front of your face, ways to handle work, parenting, and home management and still connect in meaningful ways with your child every day. Really!
I’ll never forget the day my neighbor, who was a registered nurse, walked across the street and gave me a pamphlet on anger management. She explained that there was help for people like me, who seemed out of control and over the edge. It was a painful place to come to, and for a few months, I wouldn’t even accept I was there. But as I observed myself it became evident it was true. I was overwhelmed and under delivering in the parenting department. I wasn’t connecting with my children in ways that made for meaningful relationships.
I was raising seven children in a small town in Montana. My husband was an over the road salesman, so I spent a lot of time running things by myself. I didn’t feel successful. I felt overworked.
I was doing my best to manage the finances, doing odd jobs on the side to fill in financial gaps, taking care of the house, yard, and laundry, fixing the meals, helping kids with homework and chauffeuring them to their lessons, games, and plays. This situation fueled some resentment and I found myself yelling a lot. Our relationships were suffering.
I knew I should connect with my kids. I wanted to. But how? Everything I’d ever heard told me that to really connect with my kids I needed to take them on special dates or have one on one time, a half hour here or an hour there. The problem was those hours didn’t exist in my daily world.
I just couldn’t figure out how to say to each child, each day, in ways that they could understand, “I see you. I hear you. You matter to me!”
Then I had an epiphany. A moment so mind-blowing that I was never the same again.
When my daughter Marie was three, she and I had an experience that opened my eyes to a new way of seeing and thinking about my role as a parent. It clarified for me, in a dynamic way, what being Present with a child looks and feels like. For the first time, I realized that being Present is what’s required to connect in real ways with our children and that it can happen in 30 seconds.
I was in the middle of a sewing project. I’m not partial to sewing. Worse, this project had a deadline and it was fast approaching. Marie kept coming into the sewing room and bothering me. She asked questions, whined, asked for food, and on and on. Finally, in exasperation, I decided if she came into the sewing room one more time, I was going to give her a swat. I had asked her repeatedly to stop interrupting me and she was just being naughty!
Fortunately for me, as she walked through the door for the umpteenth time, a thought came into my mind from outside of myself. I like to think God was teaching me this principle of Presence. The thought was, “Why not hug her instead?” This new thought startled me! It was so far removed from what I’d intended, it brought me to a stop.
I turned away from the sewing machine to face Marie. I looked at her, really looked at her, for the first time that day. I gave her a long hug and said, “I love you.” She went off happy as a clam and didn’t come back. She had only wanted a moment of my Presence. She wanted to know she was on my list, in fact, at the top of my list.
This experience happened more than thirty-five years ago, and sometimes it’s such a sweet memory that it can bring me to tears even now.
When I thought about swatting Marie it was because I was stressed out, I was frustrated. I felt she was naughty and needed a consequence. BUT she never was being naughty; she was just making her need known. When I finally stopped to hear and see her, I got the message and I responded. Marie could have ended up crying. I would have felt like a crummy mom and I would have still been stressed out. Instead, I have a sweet memory. The need for a consequence evaporated. Marie went away firm in the knowledge that she mattered. I was far less stressed. In fact, I glowed. I felt renewed and successful as a mom.
If I hadn’t had this experience, I would never have believed it. I mean, the cards were stacked against relationship success. I had to teach and discipline. I had to keep our family running smoothly. I had to make sure my kids were getting prepared to become useful adults. And somewhere in all of that, I needed rest now and then. There was just so much to do.
How was I going to sort out how to be Present right where I was, seven kids and a husband on the road. The internet was new. Google was still someone’s dream. I didn’t find ‘family connection’ in the encyclopedia. And frankly, my friends who seemed to have it all together, when we had private conversations, were struggling just like I was. And I bet that if you’ve tried to figure this out you haven’t come up with much that you can fit into your life either, internet notwithstanding. We need more practical information on how we can be Present with our children, how we can connect with them, doing all the mundane tasks we do every day.
I didn’t become an expert on connecting with my children right away. Over the next twenty plus years, I learned six valuable parent-child skills which went a long way in helping me see and hear more clearly. I learned eight connection points, Touchpoints, that when viewed through the lens of being a Present parent helped me to connect daily. I learned life skills that assisted me to understand why I was feeling overwhelmed and resentful.
As I began working with families, I saw firsthand how easily these simple skills and touchpoints could radically change the family dynamic.
At the end of a live event, a father with teary eyes told me he had always wanted to connect with his children consistently but hadn’t known how. He was short on time! This father was gone each day working eight or more hours. When he came home it was difficult to connect with each child in a meaningful way. There was so much competing for his time in the few hours they had before bed. There was the deluge of homework, mealtime, and the chaos of getting kids to sleep. Not to mention his need for downtime to unwind from a busy day.
What brought tears to this father’s eyes was the comfort of knowing he could connect in meaningful ways with the time he had. He felt the information was life-changing.
I’m not saying that dates, special events, and one on one time aren’t valuable. They are. But I only recall two dates that I had with my dad as a kid and none with my mom. And in all the years that I’ve worked with moms and dads, I’ve met very few who have been able to do this type of thing with multiple children, consistently. They want to. They start gung-ho but it doesn’t last. It takes consistency daily to create healthy, bonded relationships. It takes more than the occasional special event.
So, what’s to blame for the lack of information on how to daily connect. It’s just too simple. We’re all looking for a silver bullet, some big thing (like a weekly date) to resolve our relationship issues with our kids. But there is no silver bullet. Just the simple truth that moments of connection can and should happen during the daily activities we engage in already. It needn’t be out of the ordinary or planned ahead. All you need is to see what you already do every day in a new light and you too will be transformed and so will your family relationships.
It doesn’t have to take you years to learn how to do this. In just a short time, implementing even one small change in how you approach what you already do every day, you can see dramatic results.
I realized I had to make some changes. However, it wasn’t until I moved from rural Montana to Salt Lake City, Utah that resources really began opening for me.
I learned to think differently and to implement tools and strategies for change.
As I did, I began to see growth in ways I never thought possible.
I never thought I would write a book. But I had to because what I had learned was life-changing, family changing. I knew that there were thousands of parents that wanted to feel better and to do better. But they like me didn’t have the needed information.
So, I got up at 4 am six days a week for six months and I wrote. I wrote about my failures and my successes. I wrote about kids and adults and the dynamics that can sometimes trip us up. I wrote about changes we adults can and should make to have more peace and enjoyment in our families. I wrote about kids and what they really need and want and how easy it is to give it to them. I wrote about ‘real’ parenting, the everyday, messy, noisy, and demanding kind.
I wrote this book because I know that anyone, with the correct support, correct information, good tools for change, time, and consistency, can live better, be healthier and far happier than they are now, and can weld strong family relationships.
If you implement only one thing from this book it will change your life! You don’t have to master the book. You do have to implement one thing. Anyone can do one new thing!
You don’t need to take forty years to learn how to connect with your children every day, no matter how busy you feel. You can make a change now.
Learn about 6 parenting skills, so that you can hear and see your kids even when you’re annoyed at them or are feeling stressed yourself.
Recognize 4 daily Touchpoints that will help you connect with your children daily.
Understand the difference in adults and kids so that you can enjoy yours more and feel resentful less often.
I want you to have this book. It’s something you will return to repeatedly. It will make a difference for you, your children, and your family. I ‘m giving you a discount so that anyone can have this book. I want you to save 25% on the cost.
That makes this book less than the price of going out to dinner with your spouse, but I can promise you it will give you far more joy than a meal out; joy that will last a lifetime with those you love most.
Imagine what life will be like when you can manage a stressful morning without coming apart
Imagine what life will be like when you are consistent
Imagine what life will be like when you connect daily with your children
Imagine what life will be like with less overwhelm, less resentment and less mental fatigue
Imagine what your family will feel like when your kids know they are seen and heard and that they matter
Every day you wait is one day less that you have with your kids. It’s one less day that you have to practice the art of sending the clear message to those you love most, that you see them, hear them and that they matter. It’s one less day that you go to bed feeling successful.
So, click the link and begin enjoying your kids, your family, and your life more.
Remember, you can receive over 40 years of experience in being a happier, more connected, and less resentful, overwhelmed parent and you can receive it at a 25% discount. Go ahead, order your peace of mind now.
ORDER IT NOW Promo Code: PRESENTPARENT19